It’s always darkest before dawn
Life is a journey, and that journey is dynamically contrasted between horrible hills and valleys, but ever so often you arrive at a stream, and we rest, we have a drink from that stream. Refreshed and rested, we get u and continue the journey. Every change, every response to those changes, our failures, our derailment, and our triumphs, are all part of things we did, things we do each day.
We never know what the right decisions are, we make assumptions of outcomes, we make decisions based on information we have in the present, and we strategize, and we hope the results are favourable. But it’s all things we do, and these things are part of our healing from whatever bad experiences happened to us on this journey.
Some experiences are described as life-changing, the stoic says it’s all part of life, how we princess pain, how we respond, it’s all part of the whole.
I do not believe in coincidences or mistakes, I believe in decisions made that lead us to outcomes. We use words such as coincidences and mistakes because they are comforting, or remove responsibility. I supposed we must find ways of forgiving ourselves, we must make amends without expectations, but healing starts with acceptance and acknowledgment of what has been done whether you are the one that causes pain or receiving pain.
We must also forgive others, but remember the pain, and never let it happen again. We must also, learn to be kind to those who hurt us, the hardest things you will ever do… but we must be wary of not being taken advantage of. We must have agency of who gets access and how they get access to us.
We must take time, our time, we must process, and experience all stages of grief, including anger, we must process. They do not always happen in sequential order, but the last stage is acceptance, and then our healing can begin.
“We do not always see the light at the end of th tunnel, but the human spirit is resilient. Hang in there.” Someone told me not long ago.